You're Not In Love with Me

You’re not in love with me.  

You’re in love with the concept of who I used to be.  

When things were easy.  When you got your way.  

You want the meek little girl I used to be.  Who never challenged you.

You want someone who will adore you.  Who will sit back and let you be the center of the universe.  

You want someone to tend your house and raise your kids.

You want someone for you.  

You do not want me.

I want someone who challenges me to be better.  Not more pretentious.  

I want someone who makes me laugh with them, not at someone else.

I want someone who delights in my children, even when they are screaming and fighting and generally acting crazy.  Because that’s who kids are and what they do.  Not someone easily irritated at the noise and chaos.  

I want someone who wants to change the world with me.

I want someone who delights when I pour into them, not someone who expects it and gets mad when I don’t do it.  

I want someone for me.  

I do not want you.  

So where do we go from here?  

We walk away.  

Gently.

Peacefully, I hope.  

Acknowledging that we are not the right person for the other and wishing each other well.

We won’t linger on our hurt feelings, because feelings fade.  Especially when we don’t tend the fire.  

We will stop trying to change each other and recognize that the other is a good person, just not the right person.  And that’s okay.  

I wish you happiness.  And peace.  And it’s okay if it takes a while for you to find it.  The journey is the place where we grow.